IT'S NOT A F*CKING REALITY SHOW, MISTER PRESIDENT
Are we going to bomb Iran? TUNE IN TO NEXT WEEK'S EPISODE TO FIND OUT!
What did we say this morning? Something about how "They want a war with Iran," and "Please do not listen to news reports about Trump telling his people to cool their jets with the Iran talk, because they want a war with Iran, and all they are looking for is their trigger"?
News came out early this morning that Iran shot down a US drone in the Strait of Hormuz, outside Iranian waters. Let's see what our president and his war-bonering GOP shitmouths in Congress have had to say about that:
Great. Just great. So what's happening now?
The President is meeting with Bolton, Pompeo, and Shanahan on Iran. This is deeply concerning, and a moment when hi… https: //t.co/rlvbKXczo1
— Brian Schatz (@Brian Schatz) 1561044127.0
Awesome. Just splendid. Trump is having a cuddle party today with John Bolton (who's had a hard-on to bomb Iran since the Bush administration); Mike Pompeo (who's been making the rounds lying and saying Iran and al Qaeda are best friends, thus implying that it's very legal and very cool for Trump to strike Iran without congressional authorization, based on the Authorization for Use of Military Force (AUMF) Congress voted for five days after 9/11 ); and Patrick Shanahan, the outgoing acting Defense secretary, who will make way for another acting Defense secretary, because who needs real Defense secretaries? (The new guy, Mark Esper, is part of the meeting too.) And as Senator Schatz points out above, Trump is emotionally unstable and doesn't know dick about foreign policy, so it's just great that he's having an emergency meeting with these unhinged hawks about this right now.
Tell us what this all means, unhinged hawk Lindsey Graham!
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GRAHAM: Here's what Iran needs to get ready for -- SEVERE PAIN INSIDE THEIR COUNTRY!
That's just fabulous, Lindsey Graham is very excited about bringing the pain, how wonderful.
So what's the what, Donald Trump? You gonna bomb bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran like a common Dead John McCain?
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MSNBC'S HALLIE JACKSON: Mr. President, will you strike Iran?
TRUMP: You'll soon find out!
Nope, dude, it's not a fucking reality TV show, and we are not waiting until next week's episode to find out what you are going to illegally do without Congress's authorization.
Later on in the White House, sitting next to Justin Trudeau, Trump was asked again if he was planning to strike Iran, and he said what he previously said on Twitter and to Hallie Jackson, because Trump doesn't know many English words:
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TRUMP: They made a bad mistake, OK? [...] You'll soon find out!
After these commercials, right? Is Trump going to love it? Or is he going to list it? BY WHICH WE MEAN BOMB IT?
Jesus fuck.
A moment later, Trump did seem to walk back some of his own rhetoric, by explaining that it's super good that Iran didn't shoot down a drone that had somebody in it , because that's a definite possibility, with drones. Hate it when you open up a drone and all kindsa people jump out like "drone surprise!" He also seemed to suggest that he thinks maybe when he says Iran made a "mistake," he means some underling made a boo boo that wasn't approved by the Iranian government.
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But again, it woulda been different if that drone was full of US soldiers. That would be different.
As Brian Tyler Cohen notes, there is of course a "There's Always A Tweet." Because why the fuck would Trump -- who supposedly doesn't want to be plunging us into stupid and illegal foreign wars, and ran for president on that! -- want to go along with a stupid and illegal plan to get us into an unwinnable war with Iran?
OH YEAH, because Trump's polls are in the shitter, he's never really been more popular with the American public than genital rashes, and he's facing re-election next year. John Bolton is whispering in Trump's ear that if he starts a war with Iran, America will come around to his side, because of how Americans rally around wartime presidents.
To which we reply, "LOL!" If that's what they think, it won't work, because all those fucking numbskulls still can't wrap their childlike brains around the fact that Donald Trump will never win the love or approval of the great majority of Americans. They do not understand that we will not believe him when he lies us into war, we will not trust him to do what's best for the country, we do not believe he loves this country or has its best interests at heart, and therefore there will never EVER be a unifying moment that causes Americans to rally around him. It literally doesn't matter what happens. He is unacceptable trash, whether he starts a bullshit war or not. And if he does, we'll still vote him the fuck out, and President Warren or President Harris will have to deal with the sad aftermath.
Deal with it.
[videos h/t Aaron Rupar ]
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> It’d be like going to war with BaluchistanAfghanistan.
FTFY
*ahem* Syria